Church of Euthanasia

The One Commandment:
"Thou shalt not procreate"

The Four Pillars:
suicide · abortion
cannibalism · sodomy

Human Population:

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The following is culled from ninety minutes of taped conversation with Chris Korda, who looks damn good in a miniskirt and heels.

The Church of Euthanasia

An Interview with the Reverend Chris Korda

by Lex Marburger

ETC: Could you tell us a little of the church's theology?

Korda: Well, by now pretty much everybody who's heard of the Church knows... that the four pillars of the Church of Euthanasia are suicide, abortion, cannibalism and sodomy. The Church only has one commandment: Thou Shall Not Procreate. All four pillars help reduce the population...

The Church of Euthanasia is primarily concerned with the ecosystem, not the human species. We're not humanists at all. We're only tangentially interested in the fate of the human species, but we're most interested in the fate of the planet we happen to inhabit and dominate... so our support of those pillars is both symbolic and actual.

ETC: What were the spiritual revelations that brought about this holy church?

Korda: I personally channel for what I describe loosely as an "alien intelligence" that my followers and I refer to only as The Being. It's not clear where The Being comes from; it appears to be from the earth, but in another dimension. It's now pretty well understood ... that the earth exists in many different dimensions simultaneously other than the ones that we are immediately able to perceive ... these beings are concerned with the fate of the earth ... and are trying to reach me and many others, particularly through the phenomena known as "crop circles" ... they are messages from The Being.

ETC: And the being is telling us to decrease our population?

Korda: The Being is telling us to restore the balance between ourselves and the earth.

ETC: Your church is incorporated in Delaware. Do you get the tax breaks afforded an organized religion?

Korda: We're working on that. It's very time consuming. Look for that in 1995.

ETC: What martyrs have you chosen to represent the church?

Korda: Well, we have saints, actually. Jack Kevorkian is due to be a saint at some point. He's an old man, he's got a few more years, but at some point he'll be Saint Kevorkian.

ETC: Any other good deaths?

Korda: Well, there were some nominations for Saint Cobain, but frankly, it hasn't really washed.

ETC: Nobody's followed suit.

Korda: He hasn't really had enough of an impact.

ETC: How come you haven't taken the matter into your own hands and killed yourselves?

Korda: It's important to understand that what the Church was really created to do is to change people's world view. Right now, the dominant world view is what we call "The Spectacle". This is the image of man as it is portrayed on television. And the extent to which people view the world through the terms defined by TV is the extent to which they participate in the Spectacle. So our primary goal is to interrupt the Spectacle with a full variety of media tactics.

We're "Anti-Spectacle"...We're attempting to wake people up out of a hypnotic trance induced by the Spectacle. It's only when they wake up, that they'll be able to perceive they're own relationship to the earth in anything other than the terms defined by the consumer economy. If we achieve that goal, then it won't be necessary to kill myself... I may kill myself, or I may not...

We actively support the right for people to die if they choose should be as easy as getting your teeth cleaned. But that doesn't mean I personally am going to kill myself tomorrow. For the moment, I continue to be able to do more good by staying alive...

ETC: The four pillars all imply voluntary action.

Korda: The church is opposed to all forms of involuntary reduction, including war, murder, the dissemination of airborne diseases, bacteriological warfare...

[here a discussion of Jonestown and Waco arises, and we talk of conspiracy theories and mind control]

We try to turn people back towards what we regard as the wisdom of the people who were here before us ... based not on thought, but on intuition and feeling ... the Spectacle was built on thinking, a product of existentialism, a belief that an individual is alone in a purposeless universe, and must use his free will to overcome his hostile surroundings.

ETC: Backing off from metaphysics: other than the lemming, is there any other symbology for the church? Something to hang from your neck?

Korda: I suppose you could hang a lemming from your neck, if you could find one, but it might start to smell after a while. Condom earrings would be nice.

ETC: Why do you call your actions "dada"? how is your religion connected with an art movement?

Korda: In order to expose the tremendous gravity of the situation, we have to employ methods that interrupt the process that gave rise to this situation ... which is a rational process. It follows that the process to interrupt this is an irrational method ...

Suppose we were to come on real serious and heavy, like Green Peace and Zero Population Growth, bristling with statistics. What kind of impression would we make then? We'd become part of the Spectacle...

ETC: In your interview with "Up" magazine, you stated that repeated male orgasm has led to misogyny and the present social system.

Korda: That is a very western point of view. Actually, we're opposed to ejaculation. In the west, the common view is that orgasm is inseparable from ejaculation. If you do research into the matter, you'll find that the greatest spiritual transformation of sexual energy is only possible when ejaculation isn't utilized, and the sexual energy that normally would have been dissipated is channeled. This is the essence of tantric magic, and is considered the norm in eastern cultures. America has been set up as a theme park for ejaculation, in which men, at a very early age, have been taught to view women as objects to ejaculate onto or into... Have you ever seen a pornographic movie?

ETC: Yes.

Korda: Have you ever seen a cum shot?

ETC: Yes.

Korda: Then you know what I'm talking about. This is supposed to be the great culmination of the sex act in western culture. That is a tremendous debasement of the spiritual potential of the sex act. Any time you open a Vogue, or Cosmo, or any Spectacle magazine, and see a scantily clad woman, you're being invited to ejaculate.

ETC: does this include Yellow Silk, Blue Blood, Paramour or any other erotic or sensual magazines?

Korda: You're getting close to the line there, because some of these magazines recognize a more sophisticated definition of human sexuality... I'm talking about the stuff you get if you open up Rolling Stone.

ETC: How do you feel about excessive drug use or smoking? Things that would kill you very slowly?

Korda: We're definitely in favor of it... and we do say that if you're going to drink and drive, it's very important not to wear your seat belt...

Fun Facts from the Church of Euthanasia

  • The human population in the United States produces 12,000 pounds of excrement per second.
  • The United States population of livestock produces 250,000 pounds of excrement per second.
  • Every eight seconds, an acre of American forest is destroyed.
  • Reality is an illusion.
  • Reality is not an illusion
  • Number of animals killed for meat per hour in the US: 500,000.
  • The Spectacle and the Nazi party are one and the same.
  • You become what you resist.
  • Save the planet, kill yourself.
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